Moms Talk Around Town: Drugs, Guns and How Happy Are You?

In White Lake

Kristal Tinsler said: "My son is 6,and we already talk to him about drugs, they are never to young in my opinion.....My sister, who is 16 and also lives with us, goes to Lakeland, and it is sad, the kids call it bakeland because there are so many drugs that flow through that school, I can not even begin to understand how they let it go on! I know they cannot watch every kid, all day, but come on, they don't even enforce the dress code, so I don't believe they enforce ANY of the rules!"

Mary Smith said:  "It is my opinion parents are a huge problem to what is going on at Lakeland (not all parents) but there are many parents out there that think their kids do no wrong. At times I see it in my immediate family where my sisters make excuses for their kids- Additionally, knowing many 16-17 year olds that go to Lakeland, I wonder how many teachers let the ball drop- just saying:)"

In Rochester

Tiffany Dziurman Stozicki said: "I believe a parent should ask if there is a gun in the house their child will be playing in. It's a smart question and something many parents don't think about, but should. No one should take offense at being asked that question. I also suggest treating computers the same way as guns -- ask the parent if there is a computer in the house the children can access and if they will be allowed to play on it. I don't allow computer use when children are over at my house or when my child goes to a friend's house -- it's off limits. There's so many other things kids can do. You never know what sort of supervision the other parents/sitters are going to provide. Go over gun safety with your children and teach them never to touch a gun if they see one in a friend's house."

Andrew Smith said: "We couldn't think of a worse combination. Guns and playdates shouldn't even be mentioned in the same sentence. What happened to good old flashlight tag? That said, we totally agree with Tiffany that parents should ask other parents if there is even the slightest chance of such a danger."

Sarah Bittner said: "I have been asking this question for quite a while, and the other mothers usually think that I am being an overprotective lunatic. But, I don't care. The safety of my kids is my first priority! We should know if there is something that could hurt (or worse) our children in a home where they play."

Sherry said: "I think learning about a gun in the house is incumbent upon the visiting child's parent; I would NOT expect someone to divulge that info – nor should that be the expectation. I do not expect the host family to present me with a list of all the prescription meds in the house (or non-scrip for that matter) or show me where they are kept; nor should they show me where the alcohol is kept. If a parent wants to know they should ask. And yes, educating your own child about weapon and drug safety is probably the best prevention."

In Birmingham

Jennifer Heard said: "As a Professional Organizer working in Birmingham, I do see a lot of stressed out moms and families. I find that many of them are overscheduled and commit to too much for one person to accomplish in a day - Supermom syndrome. I think there is a lot of guilt if one's kids can't attend as many activities as some of the other children, and in trying to keep up with their neighbors, or perceptions of societal expectations, many moms falter. "

Martha Carter said: "I know I for one suffer from the grass-is-always-greener syndrome. I always assume everyone else's homes are more organized and kids are doing more life-fulfilling activities than mine. As a full-time working mom of 6 kids under the age of 13, I've learned to accept our collective limits."

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In Royal Oak

stephen@suzanne sadlocha: "Is anyone completely Happy about being a mom? Honestly, unless your kids are perfect, you are perfect, your job is perfect, your house, your husband, your dog. Yikes it can go on and on. If perfect is happy, then I am unhappy. ... I am happy when those around me are happy. Just not sure about that word happy. Fulfilled, trying my hardest, loving my loved ones, there are so many other adjectives I can think of. In the end I would have to say yes, absolutely, most of the time."

Sue said: "I don't get enough sleep. I'm embarrassed to ask for help with my own children (ages 5 and 6). I work full time and go to graduate school at night. I'm too exhausted to even think about being happy."

In Farmington

Vera Lucksted said: "I try to be an active volunteer at DS' school and to help out where I can at DD's preschool. Then there is the community garden and keeping my own house in order (literally and figuratively). I had to scale back on other projects in order to stay on top of the things that are important to me and my family."
Maureen McRae said: "We seem to take on things as a family. The kids have volunteered since they could walk and I am sure they will carry on. Over the years we have been in over our heads, but we still manage to make things work. Sometimes it pushes us out of our comfort zone and we are amazed at how far we can push ourselves when we want to. I make it a rule to never go looking for something. I take what comes to me."

Karla Dorweiler said: "It's definitely a balancing act to find time for everything, but I think giving back to community & school is a given. My family likes to do volunteer projects together, and when possible, we do so with friends--that way, we can catch up with them while doing good at the same time. We have several regular volunteer commitments that we work into our calendar, and I help out at my sons' school as much as possible, but there are so many other causes to which I'd like to give my time eventually. In the end, anything is better than nothing: it's best to focus on what you can and are doing, rather than feel guilty about what you can't."

In Dexter

Christy Vander Haagen said: "Absolutely. However, parents need to take into account the age(s) of their kids. I am a news junkie but do not put it on when the kids are up and around or even within earshot. Plain and simple, the coverage and commentaries are both just too ugly, in my opinion. Let alone BORING. We don't put our kids in front of the tv much anyway. When natural disasters occur, I don't scramble as fast to turn off the tv as I do throughout election coverage and reporting, of course, of crimes. I don't even watch those parts of the news. In my opinion, hearing about tornadoes, floods, fires and, sadly, earthquakes isn't a terrible thing for my six and seven year olds...it is nature and, though it is tragic, it is a fact of life. Pointless violence, wars and rants of an allegedly drugged up spoiled and narcassistic fool are not, in my opinion. worthy of mine or my kids' attention...nor are they suitable for such young kids."

Tracy Mattice said: "Christy, I have to agree, age is definetly a factor. We have two daughters and the oldest is 9 yrs old, we used to let her watch the news until she heard alot of break-ins and burgleries and when she kept hearing this we had a problem with her going to bed at night, and til this day she makes herself go to bed way before my husband and I do so that she can fall asleep while we are still awake. I was actually sleeping with her for about 2 or 3 weeks because she finally expressed to me that she is afraid of someone breaking into our home. She even had thought about it so much she had an escape plan...how sad is that?? She doesn't even feel safe in our home. Well with said, I thought it would be great for her to watch the news but we found out certain topics are not worth it."

In West Bloomfield

 Linda Hasenauer said: "As we teach them, guide them and give them wings, we have to give them a foundation. Like discipline for school and sports, children need examples in a family to stay connected and live their faith in all parts of life. Especially when parents are not hovering, you will see the gift of grace and faith. Our three children use our Catholic faith to help in all areas of life. They are unafraid to pray and share even if it means being different." 

In Fenton

Vera Hogan said: "Only thing that works is rest, fluids and Tylenol. Throw some popsicles in there as a special treat (it's a fluid). "

Krystal Matthews said: "I also introduced Lego Men and Heart shaped gatorade ice cubes! Those were a huge hit and helped them stay hydrated!"

Ellie Shansky said: "I gave mine Vitamin Water, which is essentially Gatorade, too. It was a "treat" and put my mind at ease that they wouldn't become dehydrated. The garlic I just cut into little pieces and had my son swallow them like a pill."